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Well, here I am making my resolutions (6 in all!) when by the time I get to the last one (good thoughts, spread them…) I realize that a few days ago I broke that resolution (ALREADY!- maybe it doesn’t count because I broke it before I even made it, but I’m going to apologize anyway). Here goes. You see, a few days ago I published on my blog a list of the most horrific and underreported birth stories of the past year. Sure, I put a ‘caution’ at the front, but if you are anything like me, you’ll read them anyway, and then lay awake haunted by how awful it all is. And the thing is, knowing about these terribly sad stories doesn’t really make anything better, not for the women or families involved and not really for the millions of women who are pregnant and are choosing a place/way to birth right now. It might scare them into a homebirth, but a fear-based homebirth isn’t really what anyone’s after, is it?

I think everyone will agree that there are plenty of incredibly frightening birth stories out there in the world. How ’bout we spread some of the good stories, even if they aren’t your own? I’ve got a collection of about 3 that I tell people about whenever I get the chance. The first and second are my own births, the third is a wonderful story of a post-term unassisted vbac at home. It’s fabulous. And I want some more, because I want to compile them into a book of birthstories and comics and funnies and writings that any of us could give to a new-ly pregnant mama and feel confident that it will grow trust, in our bodies, and our births. So, check out the post ‘calling for Birth stories!’ if you’d like to spread some good thoughts around with me…

xox,
Heather

If you have a birth story (preferably unassisted, but if it’s assisted it shouldn’t focus on the midwife- not that she’s not totally AWESOME, please don’t understand, I LOVE midwives! - too much, I’m looking for birth stories that focus on the mother, the baby and the birth process.) please send it in to be included in the next Hathor book (I’m too poor to pay you, but will happily give you a couple of the books and my undying gratitude!) Plus, you’ll be in print! My friend, Gurumama, is going to be editing the book so I’ll be passing the stories along to her and she’ll be in touch about whether they’ll be included or not…Please forward this widely!

Here’s what you can do to make the birth story exactly what I’m looking for:

1. remove the paragraphs where you’re making your decision to birth at home, or birth unassisted. for instance in my birth story of Gwyneth Kai, I’m going to remove the first paragraph where I blather on about wanting a birth that was free of interventions. For the sake of argument, lets agree that the audience for this book already WANTS a birth that’s free of interventions. Let’s ASSUME we live in a world where ALL women want no interventions. It’s a given. How would you start your birth story then…probably at the first contraction, huh? Okay, start there.

2. If you’re telling an unassisted birth story or an assisted birth story, let’s just call it a birth. Take out all the qualifiers and just birth that baby!

3. fear is fine, but how ’bout a little bit about how you ‘rise above’ the fear? And don’t forget to include those moments when you weren’t afraid. I like to read birth stories where the laboring mother ‘just knew’ what to do. It comforts me, and when I gave birth the third time I was able to tune into my instincts because I had read so many birth stories by women who ‘just knew’.

and 4. if you think your birth story can do all of this but it includes an intervention anyway, heck, send it in. Interventions happen, as do transfers, it’s how we FEEL (and write) about them that matters. Can your birth story tell how you transfered to the hospital and delivered your breech baby into the hands of some strange doctor, but still, wow! isn’t birth great?! and wouldn’t you do it again?

So, that’s what I’m looking for…please send them in! hathor at thecowgoddess.com or in the comments below.

xox,
Heather